Snowboarding...my therapy!

With all that Jaime & I have been through the last month we felt it was time to take a break & enjoy some quality time together. What better way to do that than sharing in our favorite pastime...SNOWBOARDING!!!

I have to tell you I wasn't the biggest fan of the sport when I first started. I actually hated it! I had no idea how different it was from skiing. I figured I'd catch on without a problem considering I knew how to ski. Boy was I wrong! They are two totally different sports. I spent my first season boarding the wrong way! I guess that may have been the reason why I didn't seem to get it. I just couldn't figure out what I was doing wrong but I was determined. After a few trips into the 2nd season we finally decided to try switching my stance and viola...it worked! I'm not shredding the gnar =) or doing crazy stunts but I really enjoy it now. It's definitely therapeutic for me. I think the best part about it is that it's something Jaime and I both love & can do together.

So...our first trip of the season was to Northstar. We were hoping it would be a nice day considering how crazy the weather has been but we had no idea how lucky we'd be. The day was PERFECT! Not a cloud in the sky! We were enjoying ourselves so much we didn't realize the time. Before we knew it the day was over and we had to go back to reality! =(

I always enjoy our trips up the mountain & hope to we can get in a couple more. Here are a few pics I thought I'd share.

Life...

God grant me the Serenity to accept the things I cannot change...

I swear that prayer is the story of my life right now! First off, I just want to thank our family & friends for all the support & prayers through this difficult/challenging time in our lives. Unfortunately, life just isn't fair sometimes. I feel like no matter how hard I try to think positive things NEVER seem to go our way. I know God has a plan for us and that our prayers will be answered eventually but my patience is starting to run really thin. Life just isn't turning out the way I imagine it would but I'm trying to keep the faith & stay strong. I know God would never give us more than we could handle but I tend to doubt that from time to time. He's definitely testing us right now and I know I just need to stop with all the why me/us questions. I can only hope & pray that things will turn around for us soon & that we can finally have our one wish...to be parents! Ugh! Just the thought makes me soooo emotional. Let me take a minute to breath before the tears start falling.

Ah...ok...sorry! Let's switch it up a bit shall we...I didn't mean to get all emotional but I just can't help it sometimes. I guess I should try to look at the upside of things...my marriage has changed a lot but for the better! I am sooo grateful to have such a wonderful husband going through this with me! Jaime has been very supportive and has been my rock to lean on. I don't know what I'd do without him! Whenever I'm down he's there to cheer me up & he always stays positive no matter what the outcome may be. I wish I could be more like him! One thing I know for sure is that this situation has definitely strengthened our marriage. I've heard people say when couples go through a trying time like this it can ruin their relationship. Lucky for us it's just the opposite! Even though we've been together for 10 years this is the closest we've ever been. Hopefully our prayers will be answered soon. I know it's all in God's hands and I need to leave it up to him!

We've been cleared for take off!

Hahaha!!! Sorry, I gotta make light of this situation some how! Anyway, just wanted to give you all a quick update. We saw the Dr. yesterday to see how my body was reacting to the menopur and we received good news & bad news. The good news is...my body is taking the medication well and we can continue with the treatment (hence the title of my blog). Some of the follicles have matured but not quite to what the Dr. would like to see which brings up the bad news...I had to have an extra injection last night. Ugh! All this before the BIG one! Literally!!! Tonight I have to have the HCG injection & because this med needs to be in the muscle the needle is MUCH longer than the others, 4 times longer to be precise. Yikes!!! I'm hoping it won't be too bad. I just keep telling myself it's ok...it'll all be worth it soon! I just need to stay positive and "stick" it out! hahaha!!! We have one last appt for this round of treatment on Wed and after that it'll be the part I hate the most...the waiting game! For 2 whole weeks I just have to sit back, try to relax, & pray that this is our lucky month. Hopefully the New Year will bring some great news! I have my fingers crossed!!!

Hope you all have a wonderful holiday with your families!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!

Here we go...

So for those of you who aren't already aware, I had to start the dreadful treatment of menopur which are the fertility INJECTIONS!!! Yes, I know...I'm sure the first thing that popped into your head is TWINS! Believe me it's come across my mind MANY times already. Though the more I think about it, the more comfortable I am with whatever happens. If that's what God has planned for us, we'll take it! We just want to be pregnant already! Sheesh!!!

So last night Jaime had to give me my first injection. Let me tell you...that was definitely an experience I won't forget! I think we were both freakin out about it! We were dreading the day it would come to this and unfortunately it has. It took us 20 minutes alone just to get everything prepared...sterilizing everything, prepping the needle, mixing the meds. I think we read the instructions 10 times just to make sure we were doing it right. Finally after all that it was time for the shot. I'm not sure who was more nervous me or Jaime. Since I HATE needles I had to turn away when he did it. The initial poke of the needle wasn't so bad but as he started to inject the med that's when my feelings changed! I couldn't wait for him to be done. It seemed like it was taking forever! I even kept asking him if he was done yet. The sensation I felt was nothing like I've experienced before. It's kinda hard to describe...I guess you can say it was more like a burning sensation than anything else. I thought it would go away as soon as he was done but unfortunately the feeling lasted for a little while. Ugh...the things you do to conceive! Hahaha! =) I know it'll all be worth it in the long run so I don't mind having to go through all of it.

We have 3 more nights to go then we see the Dr. on Sun for an ultrasound. He'll determine then whether we should proceed with the treatment or cancel and try again next month. It all depends on how my body reacts to the meds. I'm praying that it cooperates! I'll keep you all posted.

For now I thought I'd leave you with a picture of what my life will look like for the next 3 nights! =)

Happy Holidays!!!

From the newest reindeer of Santa's Sleigh...Molokai!!! Hahaha!!!

Hope you all have a Merry Christmas!

Love, The Antoque's

Round 4

So here we are in our 4th round of treatment. I honestly thought we'd be pregnant by now considering all of our test came back fine and there isn't anything wrong with either of us, but unfortunately we're not. =( I was told by the doctor recently that the average couple only has a 20% chance of getting pregnant each month! Can you believe it...20%!!! I was shocked when I heard that. The reason being is because a woman only ovulates for 12-24 hrs out of the whole month! Which means timing has to be perfect! Who would have thunk it! This whole time I thought I'd get pregnant the minute I got off the pill. Boy was I wrong!

After seeing the doctor a couple weeks ago, he recommended to try the same treatment for one more month before we even discuss the "I" word...INJECTIONS!!! Ugh...I'm soooo afraid! Jaime & I are praying we don't have to get to that point but chances are if the treatment we're on now doesn't work by the 3rd or 4th attempt then it won't work at all. If we do have to do the injections our chances of having multiples increases dramatically. Can you imagine...we could be Jaime & Janelle plus 8!!! OMG!!! Just the thought stresses me out! The chances of that really happening though are very slim. Most often the results are only twins which is still alot but at this point we'll take what we can get! Who knows if we'll ever get pregnant again. Jaime & my grandma actually want twins! Can you believe it!?!? They want twin boys! My grandma thinks they'd bring good luck and she already offered to help babysit. Hahaha!!! She is too funny! We'll see what happens...I'm just taking it one day at a time and hoping that this will be our lucky month. I pray everday that it'll finally happen for us. I know it's all in God's hands so we'll see what he decides. Hopefully we'll have some good news soon! Please keep us in your prayers! Thanks again to everyone that has supported us through this rough time in our lives. We truly appreciate it!!!

My first trip to the shooting range!

Today Jaime took me to the shooting range for the very first time. My dad & grandpa use to go when I was younger and I always wanted to go with them but of course being a girl they never let me go. Luckily, Jaime was recently introduced to this crazy adrenaline rushing pass time by his coworkers and since he was off today & I was home early from work we decided to go to the indoor range here in town. I gotta tell ya when we walked through those doors and I could hear the shots being fired my heart definitely started pounding. As we waited to get our guns & ammo I began to get VERY anxious. I started to get real hot, my palms were clammy, & my heart was beating out of my chest! My "Oh Shit-O-Meter" was definitely rising & fast! hahaha!!! I had no idea I'd be so nervous!

After finally getting everything situated we walked into the shooting range. I couldn't believe how loud it was in there, I even had on earplugs AND earmuffs. The sounds of the gunshots were even more intense inside the range, you can actually feel the vibrations when they go off. It was quite an experience. After somewhat getting use to the noise and Jaime showing me how to use the gun, it was finally my turn. I had never held a gun before, let alone shoot one, so this was definitely a memory I'll never forget. I was sooooo nervous!!! As I aimed for the bulls eye I could feel my hands shaking. I tried to keep as still as possible before finally taking my first shot. All I can say is...WOA!!!! Jaime warned me it was a rush but I had no idea! It was CRAZY!!!! Scary but a great natural high! Before I knew it we were out of bullets and it was time to go. =( I must say this was a really great experience and I'm glad that Jaime took me. Hopefully we can go back sometime soon since it's not too far from our house. =)

Here's a couple of pics Jaime took of me shooting for the very first time...I used a Glock 22 (.40 caliber)
He also shot a video which I wasn't aware of. Check out the recoil...I think that's what I was scared of the most!

Here's my final results...
Not too bad I guess for my first time. I was just glad I hit the bulls eye atleast once. =)

Greeting Cards

A few months ago (thanks to Jess) I finally bit the bullet & bought a Cricut Machine. I've ALWAYS wanted one especially since I scrapbook (well not so much lately, but I'm trying to get back into it). Anyway...I could never get myself to buy one since they're sooo expensive. Well...I guess that saying "good things come to those who wait" is true because I was able get one for half the reg price. Thanks again Jess! She was the one who sent me the link to the website having the sale. I'm still learning how to use it, but luckily a few celebrations came up for me to practice. Just thought I'd share what I've done so far. What do you think? Do I have a future in card making? hahaha...j/k!!!

Here's my very first one...
Oh! and here's a couple of others that I did...I did the best I could with the 2 cartridges I have. I'm hoping my card designs will improve once I get more cartridges. There are a few I'm eyeing...good thing Christmas is around the corner! I know exactly what to add to my wish list! heehee!!! =)

My first blog!!!

So...I've been contemplating for months now on whether I should start a blog. I know so many people that blog about their lives (which I love since it keeps me updated) but I just didn't think I had anything interesting to blog about so I figured why bother. Well...with some encouragement from family & friends I FINALLY decided to do it!

As most of you are aware Jaime & I have been struggling to start our own family for over a year now. People are always asking how everything is going so I figured I might as well blog about it to keep everyone updated. Unfortunately, we haven't had any luck yet but with the help of a fertility specialist we're hoping our dream will finally come true! So far we've gone through 2 rounds of treatment. We're currently on our 3rd attempt and hope to have good news soon! I'll make sure to keep you all posted. Until next time...happy blogging to you all!